Today's brides and grooms are more assertive about what they want for their ceremonies, and that can lead to clashes with the traditions of their family and culture
The rise of the Pinterest bride has transformed the modern wedding. People used to turn to planners or venue directors for guidance and acquiesce to their chequebook-wielding parents on everything else. Now, couples arm themselves with a cache of photographic inspiration for dresses, floral arrangements, flower crowns and welcome signs.
For Indian, Vietnamese, Persian, Jewish, Greek and an increasing number of ethnically mixed couples, however, the era of the Pinterest wedding has raised a thorny problem: Sometimes, tradition clashes with inspiration. Or, more accurately, with the inspiration boards.
Multicultural couples “don’t want their parents’ wedding”, says planner Christine Godsey of Washington, DC-based firm Engaging Affairs.
While they’re at it, they don’t want their parents’ house of worship, 500-person guest list or 26-item buffet, either.
This year, Indian, Persian and Greek alike – are going the rustic route, choosing wooded venues, farmhouse tables and natural elements, and imposing bans on the red-and-gold hues associated with weddings in their motherlands. They’ve scaled back guest lists to 100 or 200, which can seem tiny compared with the weddings of just a few years ago.
Old-world rituals still matter to couples, but Godsey’s clients tell her, mostly because they are important to their parents.
But as couples drop some rituals, scale back guest lists and seek one-of-a-kind experiences, wedding coordinators have been able to ease differences between couples and their parents – and to explain to parents when their ideas won’t fit into the vision.